How do I motivate my child to learn?
Catherine, from NurtureWorks in Busselton WA, interviewed me recently to explore this frequently asked question.
C Thanks for talking about this topic with us.
A My pleasure.
C Firstly, why is 'How do I motivate my child to learn?' such a commonly asked question? What's happened to our kids?
A 'Belonging' or 'fitting in' is really important for most kids at school. The idea that 'academic learning is dumb' is frequently portrayed through various media and this is very easily picked up on by kids who are not 'top of the class' material or kids who have missed out on crucial learning building blocks. Because they are often not within the ballpark of the 'brilliant', they choose to join the ranks of the disengaged. They feel the need to belong somewhere, and they are not aware that there are other choices. I don't think that kids clearly receive these important messages:
· it's ok to be who you are as long as you're trying to 'grow' or progress
· everyone is better at some things than others
· many people are confused about things they realise they should know, and they would like to do better but don't know how to go about it
· everyone is on their own learning journey and it's a personal thing you can learn to control
· you can use your mind as a tool or a weapon...your choice
C What do you mean by 'You can use your mind as a tool or a weapon?
A I mean the way you think really affects the way you perform. You can train kids to think positively rather than negatively.
C How can parents know for sure that there really is a problem?
A They've probably seen negative and/or avoidance behaviour in relation to certain areas of the child's education. They could also ask themselves whether the child is progressing at a realistic rate or not. These are two reliable indicators of a real problem.
They should most definitely ask the child how they feel about their learning. And there's a way to do this and a way not to. A calm and serious approach is essential. Tone of voice is everything.
And of course, they should ask the teacher/teachers involved about specific areas of concern.
C So how should a parent begin to tackle the problem?
A They should model the behaviour they want the child to exhibit.
If they want a motivated learner they must show the child by example
how to be a motivated learner. This can be in relation to
anything the parent wants to learn about or improve in themselves.
C What if the child is resistant to this modelling?
A They must teach the child explicitly about positive feedback and practise this with the whole family. Positive feedback includes asking questions that help people grow. This need not be in relation to school...probably will be more meaningful to the child if not about school, at first.
C What do you mean by 'more meaningful if not about school'?
A I mean a child who is 'switched off' learning is more easily re-engaged if their re-structuring lessons happen in relation to something they are passionate about and good at. If there's something they are confident with at school, the questions could be about that. It just depends.
C What if a child will not try to improve?
A All kids (and adults) want to be successful. It's part of human nature. An unmotivated student has been presented with learning experiences that are either too easy or too difficult.
If the child is presented with suitable work... ie something they feel they can achieve with a little bit of effort (5% challenge)... and their achievement is acknowledged, positive changes will start to occur immediately.
C How can a parent make sure a breakthrough develops into a long-term change?
A By teaching the child how to give and receive positive feedback. That is crucial. My courses for parents are all based around re-motivating students, and give all the details right down to what to say and how to say it.
C Why are you developing these tools for parents?
A I've worked with students, parents, teachers, school psychologists and school administrators in relation to teaching, learning and assessment and improving learning outcomes for students. The most important discovery I've made is that parents want to do the right thing but very rarely have access to the information they need.
C What's the single most important thing parents should do to help get a child motivated to learn?
A Learn how to give and receive positive feedback, set achievable goals and ensure the child can experience success. That's three...they're all essential...and can easily be learned by any motivated parent.
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